I'm listening to the latest Deftones album right now and what has always held true for them stands as strong as ever: every album sounds different, but every album sounds indeniably like the deftones. ONly on track 3 at the moment and this song is straight-bangin' yo.

*Breath*

Anyway, i wanted to tell you a little story about usurping a scenester. While out at a bar last Saturday night with Beauty, and some friends I got into a conversation with a completely earnest friend of mine - one of the least pretentious people you've ever met. He's a loud-talker, which is fine, but he made the mistake of talking too loudly about Around the Fur (the 'tones breakthrough album, an NU-metal masterpiece) around this absolutely snot-nosed scenester wannabe who immediatley launched into "How much better ADRENALINE is (their slightly less well known debeut). It was frustrating having to sit there while a music nerd waxes all guns blazing over-intellectualizing the "significance" of 7 Words, at a guy who just really likes "Around the Fur" because it rocks and he likes to play it loud. But there was a bit of a back-and-forth going, until i finally said, "I just really like White Pony." That pretty much turned the breaks on. Neither of the guys knew what to do with it, though the Scenester tried to explain how by that point, all the momentum of Adrenaline was washed out. He then proceeded to tell me that you're either a Nirvana fan or a Pearl Jam fan, but not both. To which i said, "I like Alice in Chains." But back to the deftones...During my stint of obsession dealing with Hipsters, Scenesters, and Hip Replacements, it really got me to pay attention to what the "cool kids" talked about and how they talked about it. This scenester had his facts all wrong, misnaming albums and lyrics, taking the easy vantage point of, "WELL THEIR FIRST ALBUM WAS A CLASSIK." In the 3-album rule, i've found a band's first album, if strong in its own right, will establish an identity or sound, the second album will realize that potential, and the third album is where the band tries to redefine their sound. With the deftones, this is certianly the case. Radiohead is another example, if you start the rule at ThE BENDS (that being their kind of "hi, we're Radiohead" album), OK Computer followed with more actualization of a petential that very few people knew existed (maybe even the guys in RH didn't know it was there), and then Kid A went in a completely different direction. An example of the exception to the rule is the Strokes, missing the pattern on the third album, which basically rehashes the first two albums. So here's the formula: if a scenester overhears someone talking about the second (usually most popular, and name-droppable) album, they will go for the first, claiming all of its unappreciated greatness. The trick to turning this on its ear is going for the third album, but you have to make it more personal than grabbing the easy black sheep. You have to talk about it earnestly, highlighting a song that shows the depth and complexity of your sensitive attachement to a band at their most vulnerable.

That said. Go out and trounce a smarmy scenester, and encourage them to shove there ear farther up there ass. If there's one thing in this world I can't stand it's pretentious people who can't go on without letting someone know they disapprove of one's taste.

Love and respek y'all.

"Friday Night"

Losing track easily
in the local revelry.
It's so easy to forget
that tonight is Friday night.
Let's jet out of this place
Cause we're feeling alright

You look like Friday night.
Say goodbye.

Close together,
though we're not together
We're getting pulled apart
Can you meet me once more
Friday night isn't all the far.

You look like Friday night.
Say goodbye.

Fall into place,
into focus.
One more escape
in this nightclub.
Leaving this place
Out of focus.
Washed out in the whiskey morning
Spinning like addled satelittes
Pulling polar through the night.

You look like Friday night.
Say goodbye.

I wouldn't give up this night for a year of love
You look like Friday night.

2005 was a perfectly awful year. So why start there you ask? Because that's where I have to start to tell you about Beauty. In May of 2005 I ended a relationship that was perfect/horrible/beautiful/ugly/fun/fantastic/heartaching/heartbreaking/and most of all world ending. I only dated Katie for 7 months, from October to May but from the first time her and I hung out I remember thinking to myself "I would do anything for this girl." 7 short months into that fantastic voyage I crashed back into the earth with the realization that Katie cheated on me twice. The second time with someone whom I had considered a good friend.. I realize now that I was an idiot for forgiving her the first time.

I spent the rest of the year in a depressed funk. It didn't help things that earlier that year I was in a car accident that left serveral bones around my knee cap broken. Phyiscal therapy sucks. Even though Katie and I broke up I was in that ackward state where you still desperately want to be with someone but you know you shouldn't be. Trying to give yourself a temporary happiness that comes with being with that person even though you know that it won't be long before they hurt you again. It's like taking the short cut even though you know that if you go that way all you'll end up with is pain.

Even in my depression I was dead set on getting over Katie. The only problem was that she kept calling me. Calling my friends to see where I'd be. Emailing me. She wanted to be in my life but not to be friends, more to be fuck buddies, physically and mentally. To have that someone there to act as a pick-me-up when things aren't going right. I've had pleny of relationships, and two ended up being the F'Buddy kind but that was a long long time ago. That's not something that I do now or would do again, and it's not something that I do with the person who rips my heart out. You see I realize now that Katie and I when we dated were in two seperate places. I was totally in it (the relationship) to be monogamus with her while she was looking for a good time. I guess I missed the memo.

The constant phone calling, emailing and run-ins with the feeling of "coincidence" for me were mentally draining. It's like trying to get over your one true love when you keep running into them.

Thankfully Katie wasn't my "one" "true" love. I don't know if I believe in the idea of "One true love" but I certainly believe in the power of love. A few months after Katie and I broke up I met Angela at a party. Her and I dated for 2 weeks if that even. Angela is a sweet heart and I get emails from her occasionally but we were never really going to be a match. She had been wounded badly by a former boyfriend in sort of the same way that Katie had hurt me. I think that her and I dated eachother for that brief time because the two of us wanted to prove to ourselves that there wasn't anything messed up with us. I know that I felt that way for a long time after Katie. "Is there something wrong with me?"

In the middle of October I began seeing a girl from Savannah Georgia named Mallory. It was a year give or take a week that Katie and I had started dating. Mallory is great. Great person. Great girl. Great friend. Her and I dated for a little over 2 months. The problem between her and I was that we both knew that our relationship wasn't going to last. It was fun while it did however. The straw that finally broke the camels back came a few weeks before we called it quits. Her sororiety was having there annual fall semester formal dance. One in which parents are invited and it was the first time her parents were coming all the way from Georgia to attend. When I met them I acted as perfectly as I could. I wanted them to like me. When she introduced me to her dad he looked me dead in the eye and his first words were "I don't like it that my daughters seeing a boy from a blue state." This statement rocked my world. Mallory will tell you herself that she has "Daddy issues" but if you get her drunk enough she'll admit that she one of the things she really wants is to have a good relationship with her father. I know she's considered him a jerk for a long time but she's still a good friend of mine and those two seem to be getting along fine now or so I hear. At the time I wanted to cold clock him and kick him out of my apartment but I didn't. I shook off the statement and spent the rest of the evening on my best behavior. It was later that her and I talked and decided that we weren't really going to be going anywhere together.

I almost met Beauty back when I was dating Katie. Beauty and Mallory are members of the same sororiety and very close friends. I was attending some a philosophy colloquim with Katie and afterwards Beauty was going to be handing out some fliers for a poetry reading sponsered by some groups on campus. This was a few months before I got into writing lyrics and poetry and I figured "this isn't really my thing" so Katie and I left.

Why do I call my love Beauty you might ask? That's simple, it's because she is absolutely the most beautiful person in the world. She is the jewel of my eye and the keeper of my heart, and the guardian of my mind and spirit. I had met Beauty briefly when I was dating Mallory and truth be told I remembered her because of how beautiful I thought she was. I was dating Mallory at the time though so I really didn't spend much time getting to know her. In February of 2006 Mallory asked me to come over to her place to hang out with her and a friend. Her friend was Beauty. Beauty and I hit it off immediately. All the 3 of us did was sit around talking and when mallory decided she wanted to go to bed Beauty and I came back to my place and just talked. We talked about ourselves. About our friends. About our hopes, and dreams, and families, and likes and dislikes, and what our favorite color is. We talked about how many pets we've had and why it's better to eat icecream straight from the container then in a bowl. We talked about our favorite classes, and books and movies and poetry. We talked until there was nothing else to talk about and all we could do is stare. Then we talked about that. It was one of the best nights of my life. The next day we went out on our first date. For almost an entire year I had been carrying a broken heart that Katie had left me and it had sunk two relationships. Beauty mended my heart. You know it's funny that when we started dating I told Beauty that I really just wanted to take things slow. All of my relationships had begun fast, too fast and I thought that's why they burned out. I enjoy sex, don't get me wrong, but I've never been able to have sex and not get attached. I was afraid of that I guess and that's why I wanted us to move slow. It's funny how when you want to take something slow you never really do. It was almost 2 weeks before my first time with Beauty. Beauty moved in with my roommate and I in June of 2006. It was supposed to be temporary while she looked for a new roommate but one month turned into 2 and 2 months turned into a year. A year of absolute, unadulterated, and unbaggaged love. Her and I are going to be moving into an apartment for just the two of us in a week and a half. One day I'm going to ask her to marry me. I hope she says "Yes."

It's weird how life is. You might meet someone who is your match. The person who is meant to be with you forever, only thing is you meet that person before they become your match. Before they (or in lots of cases you) have evolved to the point that the two of you of fit into eachother like the last two pieces of a puzzle. One day I'm going to ask her to marry me. I hope she says "Yes."

Enjoy your day everyone. Incase I don't write anything else this week than if your reading this I hope that you have a great week.

Peace out.

Happy Earth Day everyone.

All I want to do today is this...